Feral: Book One Read online

“Well, I can assure you I have every plan of making you ‘used to it’,” he said in a gruff, but gentle, baritone. “Such a charming young woman deserves nothing less than to be treated like a queen.”

  “A queen? That’s a bit much, don’t you think?”

  “Non.”

  He was as somber as I had ever seen him be.

  “Oh.”

  “Indeed.”

  I lifted my eyebrow with a grin at the familiar word. “Not your favorite, huh?”

  “Not my favorite.”

  I hummed my disbelief and allowed him to guide me away from my car and toward his house, not that I really considered it a house. And it did not escape my notice that as we walked, he rested his hand against the curve of my lower back.

  “You look lovely, cara mia,” he said admiringly. “How you could ever believe that a creature as divine as you could not, as you say, fit in my world is beyond my comprehension. You are, in fact, as perfect as any human being could possibly be.” He paused on the steps, just one below me, and his eyes flittered over me from head to toe. “Sì, veramente bellissima. Absolutely beautiful.”

  He moved to the same step, but surprisingly, I did not feel intimidated in the least by his impressive frame and intimate proximity as he towered over me. “How I long to kiss your lips, bella mia, my beauty.”

  “Why don’t you?”

  He looked as startled as I was at my words, and he recovered quickly with a hint of a smile. “Ah, cara, if you only knew how much I desired to… However, I fear if I were to kiss you before our conversation, I would be dismayed all the more if you chose to disassociate yourself from me after my news.”

  With those words, he moved back and offered me his arm, which I took unwaveringly.

  I half-expected the inside to be some garish display of opulence, and I wasn’t entirely disappointed, though the rooms I viewed were not entirely what I imagined. And I’d imagined outlandish colors and crystal chandeliers or something, but the Earth-toned décor of what appeared to be the foyer and living room was inviting, cozy even.

  In pale shades of olive and deep golden rod, I could definitely see the Italian influence in the room, especially in the rounded lines of the furniture that had been strategically placed around the massive entertainment center while ever-so-slightly facing the bare bay window that nearly took up the far wall. The wooden beams in the ceiling, however, were a nice twist and gave the room a mild, country flavor.

  Beyond the living space, I could see an even darker shade of olive with splashes of black and gleaming silver, which I quickly realized were the stainless steel of the kitchen appliances. There was also the hint of Tuscan red peeking from around the corner, and as he led me through the open space, I quickly realized it was the dining room.

  The dual placements were lovely. There was an open bottle of white wine to compliment the sushi—how did he know I liked sushi?—decoratively arranged on a central platter, and next to each setting were filled, beautiful glasses that I presumed were genuine crystal. Being the gentleman he was, he held my chair out for me and waited until I was comfortably seated to take his own.

  Despite the romantic ambience, I still knew it was not the principle reason of my being there, and I internally debated whether or not to broach the subject of Cole and Kendal, or to wait until Simon was ready to reveal whatever mysteries he kept hidden. Fortunately, I did not have to make the decision, since he began to speak.

  FIVE

  “Sofia, I want you to know what I said concerning Colton is entirely true.” His voice was dark and somber as he took one of my hands in his. “He is uninjured and, aside from his apparent fixation on you, is doing immensely well. But before I can give you more information on Mister Malver, there are some other concerns I must address with you first and, if I am to be entirely honest, for the first time in my long life, I am unsure as to where to begin. I suppose I must first ask you to maintain an open mind during this conversation.”

  That statement left me more confused than ever. As someone who was acquainted with unusual medical conditions and results of horrific accidents, I could not imagine any circumstance that would require some stretch of my imagination. There wasn’t much that could surprise me.

  “I suppose I could prolong the inevitable,” he continued, “by proposing hypothetical situations and inquiring as to your beliefs in them, but as I said, to do so would only put off unavoidable. It would also cause you undue stress, and your mind, I am sure, would create theories which would probably be untrue.”

  He inhaled deeply, holding his breath for a few moments before exhaling forcefully. “Sofia, as people who are interested in and study sciences, we are taught to view things with a rational eye, to seek the logical reason behind any condition presented to us. However, I think you can agree there are some things that are beyond even our comprehension, and the circumstance that surrounded Colton’s recovery, and indeed my own existence, is one of those.”

  Simon licked his lips and released my hand, pulling away from me and leaning back in his chair. “Sofia… I am a vampire.”

  I laughed long and loud, until my sides began to burn from the force of my hilarity. I laughed until tears began leaking from the corners of my eyes. And all the while, Simon sat there with his forearms resting on the chair and watched me, his expression blank, but his eyes pained.

  “Oh, I’m sorry!” I choked out between guffaws. It took me a moment to recover my breath, and I wiped my eyes dry as I did so. “I’m so sorry, but that was really hilarious. Although, I would’ve expected that joke a little closer to Halloween.” At his unaltered, steely appearance, I sobered. “Look, I’m sorry, Simon. I wasn’t trying to be rude or mean, but… I mean, can you really blame me?” I shook my head. “I mean, really? A vampire?”

  The pale lips I had fantasized about for weeks parted.

  Shlck.

  In hindsight, I would be both appalled and ashamed at the undignified shriek that burst from my mouth when two sharp canines descended into sight, but at the present, I was too taken aback to care about what noises I made.

  I sprang up, more in surprise than actual fear, and realized one second too late that I had lost my footing and was going to go crashing down onto the wooden floor. I was going to walk away—if I walked away at all—with the bare minimum of bruises to both my butt and my pride. I only hoped I didn’t crack my head wide open on the unyielding floor when it stopped my fall.

  But rather than painfully hitting the ground and seeing stars swimming before my eyes from disorientation, I found his eyes staring, unblinking, into mine.

  “You caught me,” I said, only distantly recognizing how utterly inane that statement sounded.

  His smile was amused, but sad. “Did you believe I would allow you to injure yourself in my care?”

  I laughed again, only this time, the sound was light and unexpectedly blithe to my own ears, in spite of the current situation. “No. No, I suppose not.”

  He did not release me as my mirth faded back into incredulity, mercifully less frantic than my previous reaction. I shook my head as if trying to clear my mind of the image it had seen. “Vampires-vampires aren’t real. They’re myths, fairytales, just like ghosts and werewolves and unicorns. Vampires—they don’t exist. They just don’t.”

  “Well, I am sure you will understand if I argue that, cara.”

  I felt my toes curl at his persistence in calling me beloved. “What-what are you going to do with me?” I inquired, though I instantly regretted the words and wished I could take them back. Even in the muted light, I could see the hurt that flickered over his face. “I’m sorry, Simon, I didn’t mean—”

  “It is quite all right, amore mio,” he assured me, his voice as smooth as honey. “I can, in all honesty, say I do not blame you for your reaction. After all, we are said to be creatures of darkness.”

  Those words brought to mind a swarm of questions, and I squirmed in his embrace, attempting to get into a vertical position instead of l
eaning in his arms from my almost-fall. He released me at once, his face painted with resignation, and I felt my heart ache for him. “I, um, I’m not sure what to say.”

  Simon was a vampire.

  “If you’re a vampire, I don’t understand how you can be out in sunlight. Obviously you don’t sparkle,” I said with a weak noise that sounded more like a whine than a chuckle.

  “Obviously,” he said dryly.

  “I thought vampires burst into flames or something?”

  “Certain breeds do burn more quickly than others,” he said in a surprisingly relaxed timbre. “Cara, would you be opposed to finishing this conversation over your meal, or would you prefer to retire to my study.”

  I glanced at the shrimp laid out on the tray closest to my plate then up at him, hesitation filling me.

  It wasn’t like I was scared of this man, but I had just been told vampires were real and was now trying to merge what I knew of the man I had been seeing for the past few months with this secret he had withheld from me. I needed answers.

  I slowly sat down, plucking a few of the shrimp onto my plate as I attempted to mentally grab one of the myriad of questions that buzzed through my head. I felt like my thoughts were fragile dandelions caught in a tornado, and I was scrambling to catch as many as possible.

  “Vampires,” I murmured, more to myself than to him.

  “Yes,” he responded. “History makes us out to be the spawn of demons, but the truth of the matter is that it is a disease, a virus that is spread like most human viruses, by the introduction of corrupt cells into the bloodstream of the victim.”

  “And this… this happened to Cole?”

  “As of today,” he said steadily, “there are five of my clan living here: two females and three males, one obviously being myself. The other two are Colton Malver and Kendal O’Cleirigh, Colton being the newest member after Kendal found him severely injured after an accident. He was going to feed from him, until he realized who Colton was. Instead of feeding from him or letting him die, he changed him to save his life, and brought him here, into our clan.”

  “Cole’s a… a vampire?”

  “Yes.”

  Well, I guess he wasn’t kidding when he said he changed!

  All this time Cole had been texting me, he had been a vampire, and that troubled me. Given all that he was probably going through, why was he determined to get in touch with me? It seemed odd, and there was something about it that did not sit right with me, but I was too afraid to ask him about my ex at that point. I knew I would be unable to handle the emotional impact if I were to discuss Cole too much, so my mind reached out to capture whatever question fluttered through it next.

  “You mentioned breeds?”

  “Yes,” he answered simply. “There is more than one type of vampire. Perhaps I should begin there?”

  “Wherever will confuse me the least.”

  “Well—” I could actually see the physical change from general conversationalist to lecturer— “there are several breeds of vampire, probably more than even I know. There are the vetalas, pishachas, sexual vampires, eidolons, immortals, and mortals.” He held up his hand to stop the question from forming on my lips. “Yes, there is such a thing as a mortal vampire. It in no way means we are human, it just means we are easier to destroy, and yes, I am one of the mortal breeds.”

  He licked his lips, and I could tell he was pondering whether or not to tell me whatever it was he had planned to next. “I would ask you allow me to explain fully before you make assumptions, and do not look so affronted. What I tell you next could… Well, you may now more than ever wish to rethink our situation, as I am an incubus.”

  I felt my chest constrict.

  An incubus. A sexual vampire. A creature that fed off both blood and sexual energy.

  “Stop.” When my gaze sliced through the air toward him, he looked unrepentant, but disheartened all the same. “Your face is betraying your thoughts, and I would ask that you hear me out before you make a decision.

  “It is true incubi and succubi feed off sexual energy, but that in no way means each vampire is prone to promiscuity, at least not the mature ones,” he said calmly. “Sexual vampires are the only breed capable of reproducing, but they can only do so if they are what we call blood-born, meaning they themselves were procreated instead of changed.

  “It is also the blood-born that cannot avoid a period of promiscuity, a period that takes place during their adolescence. It is a time when they require substantial amounts of blood and energy to sustain their existence, and it is the behavior during this period which has spawned the reputation that succubi and incubi have.

  “Turned sexual vampires and, indeed, adult blood-born are perfectly capable of mating with only one being, and do not require sexual intercourse with anyone other than their mate to survive. However, mated couples do tend to hunt for energy together, usually by socializing at a bar or club. They will often flirt with the other patrons to ensure they have the humans’ attention, then they become intensely affectionate with each other for the… entertainment of the others. This greatly increases the sexual energy in the establishment, and the mated couple feed off it together, creating a loop that sustains them for quite a few days.”

  “What about unmated ones?”

  As soon as the question left my mouth, I wanted to take it back. It was rude and incredibly presumptuous. However, he answered me candidly.

  “That depends entirely on the individual vampire. Some unmated incubi and succubi will engage in sexual intercourse every time they feed, others will only engage in sexual intercourse when it is absolutely critical that they do so, and others in between. And I will not insult you by not giving you the answer you truly wish,” he said with a hint of a self-deprecating smile. “I have not engaged in sexual intercourse unless my health required it. I do, however, engage in socializing to obtain a modest amount of energy.”

  Another thought drifted through my consciousness, and despite my hesitation, I found myself inquiring anyway. “Do you drink blood?”

  “Yes.” There was no hesitation, though I could see he was unhappy. “I have and still do drink from living human beings, but I try to alternate my habits with bagged and animal blood.”

  “Have you ever killed before?”

  “Yes. Early in my existence, I was unable to control my intake, and I would kill.”

  “When was the last time you killed a human? How many have you killed?”

  “Twenty-seven years ago. And in the six hundred-plus years I have been alive, approximately two hundred, and most of those being in my first few years as an incubus.”

  “I see,” I muttered, almost beneath my breath, feeling overwhelmed. “I need a few minutes. I need to think. Please?”

  “Certo. Certainly,” he said with little emotion. “I will leave you to your thoughts. If you wish to leave, I will not keep you. Call for me if you wish to speak.”

  He disappeared, and I was left to an unending stream of thoughts, concern, questions.

  Simon had taken the lives of humans. He was a killer. Could I really accept that? It wasn’t like he was some psychopath killing for twisted gratification. He was a vampire. Was there a difference between him feeding from human beings, and human beings taking the life of innocent animals? After all, human beings were, at our very core, animals—mammals, if one wanted to get technical about the issue.

  I supposed the bigger question wasn’t whether or not I could accept his being a vampire and his having taken the lives of others, but whether or not I could accept breaking off my relationship with Simon and not having him in my own. And in the end, the answer was no. I couldn’t envision altering our relationship in any way, because I knew something would be missing, something that would mean I was less joyful, content, fulfilled.

  I was also having difficulties interpreting what mate meant, and I could not imagine that it would be an easy thing to integrate into my vocabulary, though it seemed I might have to. What did t
hat mean? Was it just their term for… what? Lover? Partner? Wife? Surely it wasn’t the latter. I mean, I could only think of two things when it came to the word mate, and that was animals or the European term for friends. Of course, I had heard a phrase before about how wolves mate for life, so… maybe for vampires the term was equal to life-partners?

  I really did have a lot of questions to ask.

  Regardless of the fact he would hear me calling him, I made my way to the living room where I speculated he was waiting, and sure enough, I was right.

  He rose when I entered the room and stopped a few feet away, leaning against the wall closest to me.

  “I have to ask you some questions,” I stated firmly, “and I’m not sure how. I’m going to feel pretty stupid if I’m wrong, but why are you telling me this? I mean, if I were someone unimportant, why would you need to tell me… y’know? I can’t see how my knowing Cole would have any weight on whether or not you told me any of this, unless…”

  “Unless what?”

  “Unless I’m wrong in my thinking.”

  “And what, amore mio, are you thinking?”

  “I’d rather not say, in case I’m wrong.”

  “You would not be.”

  Once again, I found myself temporarily short of breath. “Mates—what does that mean? If I’m your mate, does that mean… I mean, will you be… Will there be others?” I managed to choke out while trying to ignore the heat that spread from my face down my neck.

  “It means you are mine and I am yours, and if you chose to mate with me, I would be bound to you and you alone.”

  It was succinct, to the point, and sounded very final, and I wasn’t positive why I was okay with this. “I, um…” I swallowed nervously. “I’m sorry. My thoughts are pretty scattered right now, and I really don’t know what to say or ask next.”

  “It is quite all right. I suspect there is absolutely no circumstance in which telling a person that vampires do exist is normal. I would never expect you to be anything more than overwhelmed, to have a million questions. Indeed, I would be quite surprised if your thoughts were in perfect order.” He offered me a small smile of reassurance. “Please. Take all the time you need, and ask whatever questions you have.”